Every single time I do a birth, I ask myself: How did I get here?! And not in a “OMG I’m so Blessed” sort of way.
More like a WTF sort of way. Think about it…
- I’m smooshed in between a stranger’s bed and their night stand. Read it again. A stranger’s BED and NIGHT STAND. Your Momma warns you about that situation growing up.
- I’m stuck wandering a stranger’s kitchens looking for their cups and getting a glimpse of their lives. I’m not creepy, but it feels like it sometimes…
- I’m seeing a stranger’s bits and pieces and she DOES NOT care at all. Part of the job, Folks. Doesn’t bother me, I just wonder how I got there.
- I walk over blood drips and blobs and help hold the trash bag for the midwives. Trying really hard to not get bodily waste on me.
- Occasionally I lean on their bed because I feel faint. Occasionally, Folks. Please don’t faint in front of strangers…
- I get really close while their placenta is being checked. Like really close. Ever smell placenta? I have.
- And then I drive home usually around 4:30 a.m.
How did I get here?!
Then I edit the photos and it all becomes clear why I’m there.
- I’m surrounded by family and/or friends of the new baby. All are a degree of Happy that you rarely see in life.
- I listen as a partner whispers the sweetest encouragement into her ear. And she trust those words as her lifeline.
- I hover over them as he strokes and caresses her hands desperately trying to take away the pain. But she leans into the pain.
- I get to breathe in her power and I’m reminded what it means to be a Woman.
- I watch an only child become aware that they just became a big brother. Confusion and then glee fills their face.
- I see a Grandma fall in love all over again with her baby and now her baby’s baby.
- I witness a partner humbled and amazed by the power of birth.
- I’m in the company of women encouraging another woman towards greatest.
- I’m welcomed into one of their most precious moments. For a few hours, I’m apart of a family.
So I ask myself again: How did I get here?
I don’t care.
Midwives : Choice