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My Milestones are Changing.

When you have a baby, his milestones rule your life.  It starts with counting kicks while pregnant, the poos while a newborn, sleeping through the night, rolling over, sitting up, first words, crawling, walking, falls, first joke, first genius move, etc.  You get it.  Baby Milestones can make a room of women OOOH and AAAHH louder than any other conversation.  And it isn’t because I really care that your little boy sat up for more than 2 minutes.  I do, but not to the level of my loud OOOOH-ing enthusiasm.  More because it transports me to a time when my baby sat up for more than 2 minutes.  That simple joy of his accomplishment.  His firsts were my first.  Any other baby’s milestone reminds me of watching my own babies’ milestones.

We’re moving into the boring Milestones.  The ones that won’t shut up an entire room of women.  Kindergarten is the last big one.  I love when I’m asked, “OMG Kindergarten!  Is he ready?  Are you ready?”  They’re good questions and I hope the answer is “Yes”.  But these are the last type of Baby Milestones we’ll get to entertain.  The next milestones aren’t a cute and precious.

He finished his first chapter book today!

He finally learned how to tie his shoes!

He graduated to middle school.

He stuck up for a kid today.

He called us for a ride home because his friend was drinking.

Still perfect and proud moments, but not as smooshy and heart grabbing.  Even those Milestones above won’t make a more seasoned Momma stroll down a nostalgic path. And I’m not mad or disappointed that my kids’ milestones won’t blow up a bunch of ovaries.   Let’s face it.  An 11 year-old will never get an OOH and AHH like a 6 month-old can.  And that’s ok.  Because fingers crossed, they don’t shit on themselves either.  I’ll take that over some OOHs and AHHHs any day.

So when your baby hits his milestones, I’ll be there OOOH-ing and AHHH-ing walking down my own nostalgic path.  But forgive me if my Milestones are boring.  Throw out a lazy OOOH and AHHH.  Give me three seconds and then I’ll ask if your baby has mastered the “I Can Get Out of My Carseat” move.  Followed by an honest chuckle and hardy AHHH.

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