Erika Ray Photography » blog

It’s No Secret

I’ve been busy.  I try really hard to not complain about it, but I fail every single day.  Most days, I fail four times before lunch.  I’m always telling someone, “I’m so busy.”  We’re all busy in our own way, so I should keep my busy trap shut.  But I can’t.  Because saying “I’m really busy” makes me feel better.  Or it gives people a reason why they’re looking at a disheveled shell of a woman.  The dishwasher broke a month ago and we haven’t replaced it.  It adds shit to my long To DO list, but I’m too busy to shop for a new one.  I’m too busy to write over here.  I’m too busy to take any more than one picture a day, because I’m too busy to even edit that one photo.  Why add more?  Work is the main reason.  But throw in some personal projects and I’ve got myself a shit storm of crap to do.

I feel bad when it gets like this because everything suffers.  We’re behind on grocery shopping, doctor’s appointments, clean dishes and laundry.  I come home.  Work a bit.  Cook dinner.  Fall onto the couch.  Unpack my suitcase.  Pack it again.  Repeat.  The boys have not had my full attention lately and I feel bad about that.  I’m stressed, so I pounce faster than usual.  As you can imagine I’m not much fun to be around.

The other day, I was ironing.  I used a squirt bottle on a difficult wrinkle and decided to squirt Coop.  He found it hilarious.  Probably because it’s been days since I was remotely funny.  I squirt him again and then gave him the bottle.  I took some fire and then let him chase his brother around the house.  When the water ran out, the kids and the house were damp.  That counts as a bath, right?