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Diva Sauce

I think we can all agree, I love a good diva.  Not the calm sweet ones.  I love the uber talented crazy as a MOFO Diva.  Whitney Houston qualifies on all levels.  There are two things that make me immediately think of Ms. Houston.  The first one: “Kiss my Ass”.  When Whitney screamed “Kiss my Ass” on Bobby’s reality tv show, that phrase took on a new level of greatness.  Why wouldn’t someone in her camp talk them out of a show?  They had to know she was on the edge of sanity.  But Divas do what Divas want to do.

The second one: crack.  Crack always makes me think of Whitney Houston.  I know.  I know.  She wasn’t on crack.  We all know it.  She told the entire world when she spoke to Diana Sawyer (Crack is cheap: great line ever. take a couple seconds and watch the link).  And that was it.  She didn’t do crack.  But the damage was done.  I hear “crack” and I start singing “It’s Not Right, But it’s Ok” or “The Greatest Love of All” depending on my mood.  When I saw a friend Tweet out the phrase Crack sauce, I pulled out The Bodyguard soundtrack and found my blender.

You can find the original at Gluten Free Girl with a very accurate description on why it was given the name Crack Sauce.  I was a skeptic.  The dipped my finger in after I turned the blender off.  It was good.  It was weird tasting.  But I was left a little underwhelmed.  And because I didn’t really have anything to dip, I put it in the fridge and waited.  A couple days later, we were having subs with my in-laws.  I brought it and slathered it all of my bread.  A totally different response from my tastebuds.  They were screaming, “Kiss my ass” with some Whitney Houston flair.  Delicious.  We started dipping anything in it: carrots, bread bits, chips, fingers.  It was crack-alicious.

Diva Sauce aka Whitney Houston Sauce

modified version of Gluten Free Girl’s Crack Sauce 

(psst. her version is vegan which somehow makes it classier)

1 C. Mayo

1 large chiptole pepper in adobe sauce with some extra sauce

1 garlic clove minced

1 extra heaping T of smoke paprika

lots of lemon zest

Put it all in the blender and blend until smooth.

Slather it on anything you can.