A couple years ago, my sister was having a faux argument with her husband. He looked at her and said with a thick Arkansas accent, “I’m not gonna do it cause I’m a grown ass man. A GROWN ASS MAN.”
Seriously, how do you not love those little words? How do you not live by those words?
I was already to write a lengthy post about why women don’t live by these words. It was going to include how we spend tons of time trying to teach young girls to embrace this attitude of self confidence (aka in my words: Not giving a fuck). It had a paragraph about how the media forgets women older than 25 because they assume we’ve learned the Lesson. That paragraph was followed by how some women just never learn and why that’s sad to me.
But you know what? You don’t need that and you probably don’t want it. And because I’m a grown ass woman, I’m skipping it today.
Instead, let me tell you what I’m doing or not doing because I’m a Grown Ass woman.
- I’m wearing my PJ pants and going bra-less for as long as humanly possible. I’m pretty sure they aren’t clean and swapping out undies would be ideal. But that’s too much work.
- I’m going to jam Taylor Swift’s Shake It and Jennifer Lopez’s I Luh Ya Papi. And when the guy in the next car looks over, I’m not going to stop. And if he looks over at the exact time, I’ll tell him he’s not my Papi.
- I’m going to start a quilt simply because I can. So can you. It’s simple. Buy fabric. Cut or rip. Sew it together. Not rocket science, but you do have to do it. Or find a friend to finish it for you.
- You were bitchy to me? Guess what? I don’t have to say Hi just to be polite. You aren’t.
- I’m not unloading the dishwasher. I’ve got kids. Work, Boys.
- I’m not putting away anyone’s clean clothes. And when you’re doing this, I’ll be on the couch. Watching.
- I’m going to reuse the zip loc bags.
- I’m going to toss zip loc bags and not feel awful.
- We need clean clothes, so I’ll do one load, but I’ll forget about the other 6 loads down there. I’ll do a sniff test and check for stains on the clothes scattered on the floors.
- I won’t obsess on one bad comment regarding work. Cause I did the best I could in the situation.
- When Mark asks for steak, I’ll make Salisbury. Probably out of ground turkey. It sounds good and I’m the one cooking. We’ll have steak another day.
- I’m not going to say, “I’m sorry” when you run into my cart at the grocery store.
- I’m going to drink wine from a box and not think it’s novel or funny.
- I’m not going to fake interest when Star Wars, comic book, geeky/nerdy junk is being discussed. It’s not my thing. I support it, but please don’t expect me to get excited.
- I’m not going to the office to watch America’s Next Top Model or Below the Deck. I’m going to watch it on the nice couch and bigger tv.
- I’m going out with Mark and friends tonight. I won’t think or worry about the boys for a second.
- I’m going to listen to the same playlist again and again and again.
- I’m going to use words that offend people and not apologize.
- I’m going to have strong opinions about really dumb shit.
- I’m going to stick to those opinions until I don’t want to and then I’m going to change my mind.
- I’m going to be passive aggressive on purpose.
- I’m going to post a morning photo and not think twice.
- And I’m going to convert it to Black & White. Cause everybody looks good in B&W. It’s true.
- I’m not going to read and reread this post looking for errors. It happens. I’ll fix them when Mark emails me.
I’m not suggesting that being a Grown Ass Woman means you can be incredibly bitchy or rude.
I’m suggesting that we let go a bit. Be selfish.
Be a GROWN ASS woman.