Friends are friends. Most people make them earlier and keep the good ones for a long time. Sometimes you keep them out of obligation. They’ve said shitty things a hundred times and you keep forgiving them because you’ve known them since grade school. But most times you keep them because your soul depends on them. Maybe you talk to them twice a year or twice and hour. In your gut, you know they’d punch someone in the gut for your honor. The friends that have seen you with teenage acne or helped you through your first heartache and loved you for you, those are keepers.
But just like learning a new language is easier when you’re young, so is making friends. After you’ve had kids, making friends becomes even harder. Especially if you parent differently or have contrasting work schedules. God forbid you have children and your other friend doesn’t. Shit that’s hard. I was pregnant with Becks and life seemed to feel extra bitter and just plain harder. I forget what happen, but I remember saying a number of times, “I have a bunch of close friends. Who needs more?” And I lived with that. Happily. But I was ignorant and sad. Of course, you can always use more good friends. And I found them.
Since that awful statement, I’ve made some of my closest friends. With that time, I’ve strengthened some of my good friends’ friendships. I’ve made friends that I would be devastated if our friendship soured. Friends that I would do just about anything for. Friendships that seem so stereotypical High-School-ish that I actually feel bad for my teenage years. Some friends live thousands of miles away. Some friends live 20 houses away. These women remind me why women are fantastic. These friends are on speed dial. I rarely worry about the time when I text them. These friends felt like family faster than any friends I’ve ever made. I’m guessing it’s because I realize how precious and difficult friendships can be. I need close friendships like I need air.
Tonight, we entertained some of those friends.
I was really planning on writing a post about how I’m so grateful to host a dinner, that’s bullshit. I’m so grateful that I’m able to have close friends. Without that little detail dinner would mean nothing.
Day 11: Close friends.